Somewhere between miles thirty and thirty five sat a lone sign that read, "Do what you love and love what you do". That saying stuck in my head for the rest of the race and remains in my thoughts as I write tonight. Too many people live by the if, could've, should've, would've, and if I had it to do over again attitude. I do my best to live just the opposite.
Last week's race wasn't my best, in fact it was sub par, for the first few days I was even a bit embarrassed about my finish time of 12:47. I completed Stone Mill nearly two hours after I had anticipated. However a week and a half later I find myself at peace with this race. Not only was I on my feet moving forward longer than I had ever before I was able to capture some learning experiences that never would have happened if I had finished in ten and a half hours.
The race in a recap:
You ever have that morning when you can't drag yourself out of bed? Or that short walk or run that seems like it will never end? That is how the first ten to twelve miles felt. I was able to run for the first couple hours with my good friend Amy, who killed this race, and fellow trail runner and friend David B. We'd soon lose David to the winding trails and I wouldn't see him again until mile forty something. Amy kept inching away and my last sight of her was around mile twenty two.
Miles eighteen through thirty just plain hurt. My body was tanked and my mind was wandering. For the first time in all my runs I thought about quitting, throwing in the towel. I kept pushing along until I climbed a small hill and took notice to the sign I mentioned earlier. "Do what you love and love what you do" is what the small handwritten sign stated and it home like no one's business. The last six months of my life have been a crazy whirlwind of events but somehow I landed where I was the most happy. I was running through the woods like a child being cheered on by people who are genuine and by people who I love.
Miles forty one through fifty fourish were brutal. Who knows what the exact mileage was, many had this race measured close to fifty five miles, but the last ten were and out and back with a stream crossing. Before I entered the out and back I received some good vibes from friends Pete, Lynn, Glo, and Big T. My good friend and girlfriend Kelly sent me on my way with a kiss and for some reason I didn't think I needed my headlamp. At this point I was "power hiking" the trails and would throw in a short shuffle here and there. As the sun began to set the course was darkening quick and I luckily was passed by David B. who graciously let me borrow a head lamp. I would soon be passed by Amy and then for the last six miles would be accompanied by nothing but silent darkness and the occasional passing runner.
After many twists and turns I would climb the final hill and cross the finish line. I had completed my third fifty miler, and this time the third time was not the charm.
My night ended by laying on the couch with my little girl talking about my race. Zoe doesn't know how far I run or necessarily why I run but she knows that it makes me happy. She asked me that night, "Daddy how far did you run today"? My answer was simple. I told her that I ran far enough to finish. What I didn't tell her and I hope that one day she can experience is that I ran far enough to answer my own questions, I ran far enough to set new goals, I ran far enough to realize I am exactly where I need to be...
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